Tomorrow I return to work, after the most amazing 3 weeks of my life. Three weeks of baby snuggles, a full heart and feeling as though everything you have dreamed of has finally all come true.
It is hard to believe that just a few weeks ago I was anxious knowing that I would be out of the workplace for 3 weeks. Now, I’m most anxious knowing that I’m leaving Conor and that I might miss something. He and I have developed a routine, a rhythm and a connection that I can’t explain. I know his every squeak, noise and when he’s upset he immediatly settles when placed in my arms. I was worried that it might be a difficult transition of him, that it was going to be difficult for R to adjust to being a stay at home Dad. Then tonight after fighting sleep, I went into Conor’s room and saw him sound asleep on R’s chest and knew immediately everything was going to be ok.
This is going to be a great opportunity of R. He is going to get to experience the joy and fun that I have.
Our little monkey is amazing, he is already wise beyond his age (all three weeks of it). When snuggled up with one of his Dad’s I just see his future, the chance to give him every opportunity, and when he stumbles he has two loving Dad’s to pick him up and cheer him on to keep going.
I knew we always wanted to be parents, but now I completely understand the unconditional love, the feeling that you want everything for your child and the shift from your needs being first to suddenly your needs are those of your child. Parenthood is amazing, and we are rocking this.
Yes I return to work tomorrow, but everything is going to be ok. I’m letting go of my need to handle everything and realize that this is a great opportunity for Conor and R to really bond. All is good. Back to work tomorrow.. thank goodness for FaceTime, texts and telephone calls!
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Just wait until the social smiles come at around six weeks…nothing like it.
As much as R might love his son, staying at home can be very lonely and isolating, and I’m a mom. There is a lot more out there for moms than dads. Having peers going through the transition with you makes a HUGE difference. For me there were new mom groups that are usually free. I’m not sure if dads are welcome to them or not. Regardless, R should try to find a physical community of some sort. Even for introverts, it can be really tough as primary caregiver. Might be an odd offer, but I’m happy to be a sounding board. My email is on my blog page under contacts. Maybe you guys have a good network of support; I don’t want to be presumptuous, but no one prepared me and I wish someone had, so I didn’t suffer those first sleepless months thinking there was something wrong with me.
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